[personal profile] pywaket
"Permanent Restraining Order"

So today was the annual pilgrimage to the Somerville District Court to get the order against the loathsome psycho ex renewed for another year. I was getting rather worried as I watched the cases that were heard before mine, because the judge today did not seem particularly inclined to grant orders. Of the more than five cases I saw, only one order was granted, and it was temporary.

Anyway, when my turn came, I went before the judge, and explained briefly why I wanted the order. He asked me some questions about the situation and then asked if I had any evidence to present. Fortunately, I had a few recent postings from the ex's reddit community printed out (thanks to someone with a strong stomach for puerile garbage - you know who you are ;-) ). He spent a few minutes reading over the documents, raising his eyebrows several times. After which he said, quote: "That's pretty crazy, I'd be very concerned if I were you, too. I'm granting you a permanent restraining order. May I keep these printouts for the files?"

I hadn't even asked for that! I was just planning on getting it renewed for another year, but the judge understood that the harassment and abuse was unlikely to ever stop otherwise. We've been separated nearly 6 years and divorced for almost 4, longer than we were together, and she's obviously unable to understand that "no" means "no". Before getting the restraining order in the first place, I'd made dozens of requests to be left alone which she aggressively refused to honor. I'd given her numerous chances to comply, and finally said that if it didn't stop I was going to court, to which she responded "I don't give a shit what the court says. I have freedom of speech." Getting an order was a last resort, but necessary. If she won't listen to me, well, that's when it's time to involve people she has no choice but to listen to, whether she likes it or not. Now, any contact, ever, means a trip to a holding cell in the back of a police car.


So many, many thanks to [livejournal.com profile] lyonesse for all of your kind support and wise words (including the suggestion to bring the the ex's own written words as evidence - I'm convinced that made all the difference!) I love you sweetie, and can't wait for our ceremony :-)

Date: 2013-06-28 02:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bluepapercup.livejournal.com
I am glad you have found a measure of peace and dare I say it, closure.

And I am VERY glad you have good support. :)

Date: 2013-06-28 02:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pywaket.livejournal.com
Thanks friend!

OBTW: Happy Belated Birthday :-)

Date: 2013-06-28 02:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bluepapercup.livejournal.com
Thanks! It's still my birthday for another 1 hour and 28 minutes, so you're still on time. :)

Date: 2013-06-28 02:25 am (UTC)

Date: 2013-06-28 02:31 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] ron_newman
Congratulations. I sure hope this works.

(I have no idea what she thinks she is accomplishing on reddit. Her audience there is much smaller than it was on LJ or on her own bboard)
Edited Date: 2013-06-28 02:32 am (UTC)

Date: 2013-06-28 02:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lyonesse.livejournal.com
constructing a petard with which to hoist herself, apparently.

Date: 2013-06-28 02:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pywaket.livejournal.com

Date: 2013-06-28 02:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com
Congratulations! I'm so glad this happened for you!

Date: 2013-06-28 02:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lyonesse.livejournal.com
good on you for going through with it. i saw that she had exhausted all reasonable options for communication when she slammed into you in the courthouse; i'm glad this is now officially recognized by our society.

*loves* :)

Date: 2013-06-28 03:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] browngirl.livejournal.com
Congratulations! (And I'm sorry it had to come to this, but I'm glad you got the full measure of the necessary protections.)

Date: 2013-06-28 04:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] whitebird.livejournal.com
I'm glad you now have a reliable, permanent defense against being psychoed at. I'm sorry you had to go through all this in the first place, though.

Date: 2013-06-28 05:13 am (UTC)
drglam: Cloned kitten, in a beaker (Default)
From: [personal profile] drglam
Wow! Congratulations. That must be a major load off yor mind.

Date: 2013-06-29 02:30 am (UTC)
ext_12246: (Loiosh)
From: [identity profile] thnidu.livejournal.com
(Here via [livejournal.com profile] lyonesse.) Oh, I am so glad for you! And kudos to Hizzoner for seeing the Right Thing To Do and doing it!
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